Crime Does Not Pay

Previously on Justin's Blog:
An unknown neighbor decided that my front steps and driveway would look much better covered in a thick layer of dog feces.

We discovered the identity of the dog's masters, who will remain nameless. In our infinite wisdom, we gave them one last chance to correct their poor choice of K-9 toilet facilities. Alas, another mammoth sized pile of shit on my walkway.

So, we finally broke down and called the pooch police. According to Anchorage's elite Special Turd Force Unit (STFU), the neighbors got a stern talking to, and a warning not to do it again.

The following day we awoke to discover another lovely steaming pile of F.U. on the walkway. So we had to call the dog patrol _again_. This time they must have utilized the good doggie-cop/bad doggie-cop routine. It's not entirely ethical, but it gets results.

Now, life is bliss once again. The FedEx guy no longer has to watch out for land mines. The pizza boy has an extra bounce in his step. And the creepy people that come by once a year offering to wash my windows are a joy to behold without shit on the soles of their feet.

The system works. I offer my lawn as living, breathing, fairly excrement-free proof!

P.S.: Sometimes, when the religious nutters come a-callin', I wish there were a few more piles of shit on my walkway.